Text Messages in Spanish

I am going to share with you a text-versation; a spanish exchage of text messages between I and my native Columbiana friend who we are going to call: Mary. But I doubt  it would even matter since probably you wouldn’t know her (or me for that matter).

text messaging spanish
Why are we doing this, again? ¿Porque lo estamos haciendo, otra vez? If you have forgotten we are training by continuous subjection; We are establishing immunity towards an allergen by means of repeated exposure to it! its DEATH BY SPANISH! HAHA
We will subject ourselves to Spanish as much as possible and do as much as we can do in Spanish.  Now Because I really wanted to improve on my Spanish I found that texting Spanish speakers is one good way to practice your Spanish provided that you cannot actually speak with one; and another thing about this is I can go back later to see how I did, now that I see it, I can tell that I made some mistakes in this exchange which also opens another door for learning.
So here’s how it went- this is unedited (except for the names) o all of the mistakes and the shortcuts are still there, I will refine it in the next part of this post:
Yo: Mamita! Como te andas hoy?! Soy Magallanes. Donde cojone estas? Y porque tiene un otro numero?? Que traviosa
Mary: estoy aqui en mi casa estoy enferma tengo que descanzar, como esta el trabajo?
Yo: Me trabajo? Es facil y no me cuesta porque soy tan aplicado, como siempre! Mami,, tiennes recuperada tu poder claro?! Porque no tengo para comprar unos flores de muerte! Es que, tengo que trabajar
Mary: Bueno, Adios hijo
A better version of this would be:
Yo:Mamita! Como tu andas hoy? Esto es Magallanes. Donde cojone estas? Y porque has cambiado tu numero de movil? Que tan traviosa eres!
Mary: estoy aqui en mi casa estoy enferma tengo que descanzar, como esta el trabajo?
Yo: Mi Trabajo? Facilmente; no me cuesta mucho sabes que estoy muy aplicado! Por cierto tiennes que recuperar poder; esta claro? Es que no tengo dinero(this could go with or without dinero, since in Spanish it is understood that “no tengo ni para. . . “ means that I don’t have money  for. . . ) para comprar te unos flores de muerte! Es que tengo que vengo a trabajar
Mary: Bueno, Adios hijo.
Note: of course we did not bother placing all those inverted signs (¿) here since it is not actually possible or even done often in text messages unless your phone supports it.
Okay, I was a little bit mean there but really: that is really how we speak with one another. I treated her like I was scolding my mother, since I found out that she was sick because of her own doing. But besides that I always tease her ever since; I always call her “vieja” which for them kinda translates to “geezer” or “old woman”. But in some contexts especially with old-fashioned folks “vieja” would mean something respectful especially if it is indeed your old man your calling Viejo/or vieja.
I guess one of the reasons I learned Spanish quite quickly is that I was always having fun making fun of her; so much that I always come up with new ways every day and every time I see her to work to piss her off in Spanish. Which she takes like a pro; I guess was also having fun having someone like a grandchild to play with and joke around with. Which goes back to our basic Translate from Spanish to English principle number 1; el cosa mas importante –the most important thing is to have fun, -necesita que divertirse. If you cannot be entertained by your ways; it can never teach you anything at all.
Here is the text conversation translated from Spanish to English:
Me: Hey mommy! How are you doing today? (andas: literally “walk” how are you walking today = how are you today- its colloquial) This is Magallanes. Where the heck (cojoñes=balls – typical expression among Spaniards) are you now? And why did you change your phone number? You’re such a handful indeed!
Mary: I am here in my house; I’m sick I need to rest a bit. How’s work? (trabajo=job)
Me: My job you say? No big deal! I am very well accustomed to it; you know I am very good at it like always! By the way, you need to be well again is that clear? (literal translation of: Tienes que recuperar poder –you have to regain your power) Because I don’t have money to spend on flowers for the dead so you be good! Oh well, I must be getting to work.
Mary: okay till next time kid!

I hoped this conversation helped you in your quest to learning Spanish; please place your reactions in the comments section. ¡Que Dios te bendiga

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About the author

I go by the name of Magallanes in this blog. My mission here is to influence you folks in the most effective way to learn the Spanish language. Welcome to my fleet!